Run by cats. Served by humans.
Cranky Kitten exists for one simple truth: the cat runs the house, and the human is staff. We just put it on something you can wear.
No glitter. No baby talk. No "fur babies are the best-est." Just dry, deadpan cat humor for people who get judged by their own cat on a daily basis, and would not have it any other way.
Every design starts with a feeling every cat owner knows: the 3 a.m. zoomies, the empty bowl staring contest, the nap that became a lifestyle, the unprovoked ankle attack. Then we hand the mic to the cat.
If you would rather stay home with the cat than go almost anywhere, you are our people. Welcome to the litter.
Why the guides
Because the cat will not explain itself
Living with a cat means the stubbornness, the purring at night and the look when the bowl is not full on time. It also means the other moments: the worry when it suddenly stops eating, and the question at midnight whether this is an emergency.
That is what the guides are for: honest, easy to follow, with sources instead of half-knowledge and without cat food ads. The cat narrates. The facts are checked.
Cranky Kitten is a project of Christoph Ploner from Eisenstadt, Austria. The legal details are in the imprint.
"I did not ask for a website. But since you are here, sit down and listen."The cat
What you find here
Guides, shirts and books
The cat guides
Guides on health, food, behavior, grooming and cat breeds, 61 so far. Written so the staff understands them, with clear notes on when it is time for the vet.
Shirts with attitude
T-shirts, hoodies, sweatshirts, tank tops, mugs, tumblers, totes, pillows and phone cases with retro cat sarcasm. Printed on demand and shipped by Amazon.
Books: Cat Memos
Our book series: a grumpy cat explains in 100 lessons how to get through life, from inner peace to the holidays. 100 illustrations per book.
Inner Peace100 lessons for anyone who wants to be left alone.
Holidays100 lessons for surviving the holidays.
Office100 lessons for surviving meetings, coworkers and reviews.
Love100 lessons for singles and tired couples.
Vacation100 lessons for anyone who should have stayed home.
Parents100 lessons for parents between no sleep and the carpool line.
Household100 lessons for ignoring the mess with style.Amazon affiliate links: if you buy through them, Cranky Kitten earns a small commission at no extra cost to you. More at catmemos.com
How we work
Honest and checkable
Reputable sources
Every guide is checked against sources such as the Cornell Feline Health Center, International Cat Care, the Merck Veterinary Manual and the ASPCA. They are listed at the end of each article, 280 so far.
With a review date
Each guide says when it was last reviewed. The texts are written with the help of modern tools, including AI, and every statement is checked against the sources.
No cat food ads
No manufacturer pays us for recommendations. Where we suggest product types, those are clearly marked Amazon affiliate links. The price stays the same for you.
Not a replacement for the vet
A guide helps you sort things out, it does not replace an exam. When in doubt, call your vet, and at night or on weekends an emergency clinic.
The cat's voice
The narrator is a cat with opinions. The jokes are the cat's. The medical facts are not jokes, and the cat never gives medical advice.
Found a mistake?
Write to hello@crankykitten.com. We check every note and correct the article.